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Showing posts from 2010

Date Night #2: Playing Pool

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Thanksgiving week is over and now I'm enjoying a long weekend of resting and relaxing.  Mr. C and I had a nice time with friends up in the McDowell mountains.  There was lots of good food and super nice people to spend the day with. I'm getting ready for some DIY projects for the wedding,and hoping that they're all as simple as they appear in my head.  My plan is to get these done by January.  Some things on my list: Make invitations Make soy candles (about 40 of them) Make thank-you cards Make more olives Sew linen table runners So, our next date night idea was to go out and shoot pool and play darts.  So exciting!  I'm awful at pool and haven't played in a really long time, but I was looking forward to the challenge. We started the evening by making a really good dinner of sauteed vegetables with tempeh in a curry simmer sauce.  We popped open a very cheap bottle of red wine (thank you Trader Joe's for selling wine cheaper than Two-buck Chuck!) and

Date Night #1: Drive-in Movie Night

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Mr. C and I have been together for a while and we love to have "date nights."  We try to go out, just the 2 of us, at least once a week.  Dinner, at least.  Every couple weeks we get our dancing shoes on and go to the nearest Blues bar and dance to the old-school R&B cover band...they're great, and we absolutely love to dance .    The other week I had the bright idea of changing things up a bit.  Try to come up with creative things to do on our date nights.  This is a big city and I thought it would be fun to find ways to see it all...and do it all under $30.  So, Mr. C and I each had 5 sheets of blank paper to write 5 different date night ideas on it.  We put these 10 sheets in a jar and every week we would pull a sheet from the jar and plan a night based on what was written. So, this week we went to see a movie...at a drive-in.  There are only 2 in the city, and I haven't been to a drive-in in a few years.  So, off we went.  I made popcorn at home, put a co

Dusting off the old box

So I'm seeing a counselor.  It's not a bad thing, really.  I actually like to go every month to chat.  I mean, I'm a social worker and being a counselor is what I do.  So why shouldn't I have some time to be on the receiving end of things for a change?  Lately, the conversations have been about my family (actually, they're usually about my family).  But getting married brings up lots of things that I'd like to think I've resolved, put away in a nice box wrapped snuggly in pretty tissue, never to come out again.  Normally, 6 out of 7 days, the box stays put.  My life is good, healthy, happy. But now that I'm getting married I find myself dealing with my box of old family stuff. I never pretend or claim that I have a typical, functional family.  I think most of my friends know otherwise.  So it's no surprise that I've tried to live the last 14 years of my life in the healthiest way possible.  That means finding some distance between certain memb

Lots and lots of olives

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So I thought it would be a nice idea to make my own olives for the wedding.  It can't be that difficult and we have tons of olive trees in Phoenix.  So, a couple of weeks ago I drove around with my step ladder and 5 gallon bucket in search for the perfect olive trees.  Los Olivos park was a good start, as I had a suspicion that they had olives there. About an hour later I walked away with my bucket almost full of juicy, ripe olives.  It turns out there are lots of ways of making olives, so figuring out which recipe was the best was difficult.  In the end, I hope these recipes worked! Picking olives at Los Olivos Park A whole park full of olive trees! Separating the green from the black...cleaning and slicing each one. The finished product...4 jars of Kalamatas and 5 jars of Mediterranean Kalamata Olives - Brine 1 Gallon water 2 cups pickling salt 4 cups red wine vinegar Put olives in jar, cover with brining solution. Top with 1/4 inch of virgin olive oil. Cover tig

To Nerina, with love

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Dear Nerina, I want to take this time to tell you how much you have meant to me these past (almost) 15 years.   Knowing you has been a gift that I will cherish forever.  It seems you came into my life knowing that I needed you alongside me - guiding me, supporting me, giving me love and loyalty, showing me strength and compassion, and just being a true companion each and every day.  From the beginning, I knew we were meant to be together, and that you chose me as your life partner... Sunday, April 14, 1996 - the eve of your arrival -  I had just returned from living in Ann Arbor for 2 years, studying and living in an incredible place.  I remember being pretty depressed after finding out that I couldn't move out of my parents house and my partner decided not to follow me to Arizona.  My depression kept me in bed for days, not able to eat, with no energy.  That afternoon, I remember looking in the classified ads for puppies.  I thought that was just what I needed to distrac

End of Life decisions

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8/31/10 Nerina will turn 15 in February.  But I don't know if she'll make it to her next birthday.  The past 2 weeks have been trying for us as we've been dealing with Nerina's apparent seizures. This week, she' s been having "petit mal" seizures daily, that last about 5-10 minutes each.  Her head just starts shaking and twitching as we watch helplessly.  She lays down and we hold her while she goes through this awful time.  The first time it happened, I just cried thinking she was about to die.  I thought she was having a heart attack and would die right there, in my arms.  But she didn't.  Instead when the tremors stopped, she just got up, walked over to her bed and went to sleep.  All day long, I prepared myself to call the doctor to put her out of her misery.  But l ater in the day she greeted me at the door, tail wagging, brushing her muzzle into my leg as though to give me a big, sloppy, wet kiss.  Not only was she not in any visible pain, she

Foraging in the city

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I'm on this kick to try and forage what I can in this city.  I live in the desert, which gives the assumption that nothing grows here and produces nothing of value.  This has been far from the truth.  In reality, Phoenix and most of Arizona has tons of fruit, veggies and other edibles right at our fingertips!  I remember growing up and my dad taking us to Los Olivos Park...car loaded with a step ladder and bucket.  He and my mom climbed the trees and harvested pounds and pounds of olives.  Then, we'd head back home and my sisters and I would help mom prepare the olives, cutting a slit into each one, then brining them.  Or, I remember when Bell Road was a 2 lane,  county road with orange and grapefruit orchards for miles around.  Again, the car is loaded with us kids and 5 gallon buckets or garbage bags.  He would pull off the side of the road, disappear into the orchard and return with buckets of juicy goodness! Or, when we'd drive to San Diego for a weekend, and, while m

Wedding dreams

Last night I had a dream that we forgot to get a DJ.  I dreamt that someone found a boombox and an old tape, and we walked down the aisle to  Aerosmith's "Love in an Elevator."  I also dreamt that we forgot to order flowers, and that people got the dates mixed up and my favorite friends were not there.  Also, I dreamt that I forgot to write my vows and had no idea what I was going to say... And , I still have 7 months to go!

Family Affairs

Last Saturday I told my father I was getting married.  This is not your usual father/daughter relationship.  My dad hasn't talked to me in four years.  On and off for 14 years.  It's a really long story, and a story that I don't really know how to begin to explain.  I don't imagine it's typical to be anxious, really anxious , to tell your family that you're going to get married.  But my family isn't exactly typical.  My parents were born and raised in Sicily, and came to the US with their ideas of how thier family should be, how the world should be.  Not much has changed in my father's mind since then. When I first began dating my fiance, I decided that I wouldn't tell my family about him, mostly because they can be pretty judgemental and intense.  I've had past relationships end partly because of the family dynamic we have.  So, I wanted my relationship to be strong enough to withstand the inevitable barrage of criticism and off-hand comments

Engagement

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Saturday, April 24th...the first time Mr. C asked me to marry him. Wednesday, April 28th...the second time Mr. C asked me to marry him and I said yes because I realized he wasn't joking. I've always wanted to get married.  I had a few "close calls" which, thankfully turned out to be duds.  I also had this vision of how it is supposed to happen.  What it should be like.  (I have a lot more shoulds than I'd like to admit).  Since I was a little girl, I had this idea of how the whole thing was to go down.  I worked at my aunt's bridal store and saw countless brides walking in with stories of how their wedding will look.  The bridal magazines were my Cosmo's and Elle's in high school.  Reading through the articles, looking at the glossy pictures of brides and weddings...set me up for this, this, illusion really.  So, the engagement is no different. There are many opinions and ideas out there about engagements (some of which are pretty ridiculous). 

Needless worry

Have you ever had days when you just wanted to close the door, turn off your phone, hang your 'do not disturb' sign, pop open a glass of wine and just walk away from everything outside?  Today, I wish I could have done that.  I'm a social worker in a high school.  Drama, chaos, sadness and angst defines my population every day.  Most days I'm fine.  I can hear their sadness and feelings of loneliness and offer support, a shoulder, suggestions, advise, or just a kleenex.   But then there are other days, like today, when all of it is just too much to hear.  I think that's when I know I haven't been taking good care of myself.  When I've been worrying about everyone else before worrying about myself.   I wish I had a button to just turn off my mind from all this worry.  I take after my mother, for sure. She thinks and over-thinks situations that have not happened yet, nor would they ever happen.  For me, I'm constantly wondering "what can I do? how c

HATE in Arizona

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This week Arizona passed the worst anti-immigrant law in the US.  I can probably go on for quite a while about how awful this is for our community and our country. As we sat, waiting for the verdict, thoughts flew through my mind of what would become of this state if this bill became law?  How many would suffer by its racist origins? Having to show proof that you were born here, being stopped by police if there is "reasonable suspicion" that you are undocumented, making it illegal to solicit work in public ( day laborers ), and so on, and so on, and so on.  It was no surprise that this passed in the House, they're a bunch of idiots; but I was surprised to know that it also passed in the Senate, with no thanks to many Democratic leaders who failed to fight hard enough to oppose it.  The Hispanic Caucus is a joke...too worried about what their white neighbor might think of them.  So, in this scenario of inaction and selfishness, it passes and ends up at the Governor'

Hiatus

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I know, I've been gone a while.  I took a small break from writing mostly because I didn't have a computer or internet at home.  I've had to do postings at work, which can be a bit difficult.  But I now have a new computer and internet (that's not "borrowed" from my neighbor), so I'm ready to get back to writing. Last year this time I was just returning from Cascabel, AZ.  I went on a 4 day retreat/fast and returned rejuvenated and refreshed.  New beginnings.  New experiences.  New opportunities before me.  I decided that I wouldn't be in control anymore.  Quite a bit has changed since then.  I've stepped back in my work with No More Deaths; still involved and active, but finding a better balance.  I made a list of the things I wanted to grow in my life and have put my energy there.  My garden, my animals, my home, my friends, and the possibility of new relationships.   For now, happy Spring...

In the dead of Winter

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I think my chickens are in love with me.  Real love .  They come out of their coop when I walk outside just to see me, they follow me around the yard, they stretch their necks up to get a better view of what's in my hand.  Well, not all the chickens.  Half of them.  Three to be exact.  The other 3 act like I'm about to have them for dinner.  They're almost 5 months old and are getting ready to lay eggs.  So I decided to get a head start by putting "fake eggs" in their nesting box.  Plastic easter eggs and a golf ball.  They're not the smartest animals on earth, so I think I may have successfully tricked them into thinking they should lay their eggs near these cool-looking ones that just appeared.  The garden is looking beautiful, in it's winter glory.  I just harvest a few pounds of swiss chard.  The kale is next.  I'm working on my compost pile and hope to have the heap of food into nice black dirt by the Spring.