Saturday, November 29, 2008

Cup of love

Sometimes the thing that makes you feel better is simply sitting, enjoying the beautiful weather and sipping the best coffee ever.
At a local cafe, Lux, coffee is an art. Plus, they gave me some apple pie to taste and tell them what I thought of it. Well, simply put..."yummy."

So. Lately I've been in a funk. It's not something that goes away. It comes and goes. It usually goes. Have you ever felt that you were the only one in the world that thinks like you? Have you ever looked around and wondered where on earth is everyone?

I've made some choices in my life that have drastically changed the course of my life. I don't regret these choices, I celebrate them, mostly. But sometimes, I wonder what would have happened if I didn't do that? Where would I be? How would my life have turned out? Would I have a family by now? Would I be here in Arizona? Would I be a mother, wife, friend? To whom? Would I be closer to my father? Mother? Sisters? Would they love me more? Would I be loved?

Someone asked me once if I feel complete. I answered then as I do now...YES. My life is rich, full, complete. But different than that of most of the people I see around me. Different than my sisters. Different than the strangers around me at this coffee shop. Different than most people I know. Different from the lovers past and present. I just feel different. I don't recognize the shoes I wear. They're mine, and I'm walking in them. But I don't know where they're taking me. My path is a strange one...

I go through the motions of my life, living it the best way I know how. And I'm wondering when I need to take the next step. When is the time that I move on? Where is the sign that my life will change again? I wait and I hope. In the meantime, I sit back and enjoy the sunshine, the coffee and pie. I sit and take in everything that is good around me.

As I was riding to the cafe this morning, I was listening to one of my favorite singers/songwriters, Michael Franti. I love his lyrics and sometimes they even hit home...

So I let go of a broken heart
I let go to an open heart
I let go of my broken dreams
I let go to the mystery
And I believe in the miracles
I believe in the spiritual
I believe in the one above
I believe in the one I love

And take one step closer to you
I just take one step closer to you
Even when I've fallen down
My heart says follow through
I take one step closer to you

I keep on walking to you, I'm walking
I keep on walking to you, I'm walking
I keep on walking to you, I'm walking
And I'm never going to stop

Even when I've fallen down
My heart says follow through
I'll take one step closer
I'll take two steps closer...

Monday, November 24, 2008

Rescuing puppies

Jack and Ivanna

So, I'm not so sure what got into me on Friday. I received an e-mail telling the sad story of 2 dogs who's owners couldn't pay the rent anymore and packed up and left. Only, they also left their dogs behind. As the dogs were trying to jump into the car and go along...they were shoved out and left standing, watching their owners drive away. The neighbors took care of the dogs by going over to the house and feeding them and hiding them from the pound that came looking for them. They tried calling all the no-kill shelters...full, to the max...thanks to the increase in foreclosures. The only place willing to take them was the Humane Society. Only, they're also full so they'd be immediately euthanized. What was I going to do? Well...I took the pups! Not sure what I was going to do with them since I already have one that's just perfect for me. Thanks to friends, I borrowed 2 crates, some leashes, bowls, dog food and went to get my new babies.

Friday: Met the pooches, Jack and Ivanna. Cuties! Put the collar and leashes on them...they immediately laid down not sure what to do with the new things around their necks. Never leaving their house or backyard, it was a new world for them! And they didn't know how to walk with a I had to carry them into the car. Had a neutral visit with Nerina, my dog, at the park across the street to do the obligatory butt-sniffing and humping. Only Ivanna would have nothing to do with Nerina. Fangs out and tail-between-her-legs she immediately proceeds to attempt to bite her...this is not a good start! Fear-aggression is a difficult thing to work out and I know that I'll have my hands full for a while.

At the house, crates are up, room is ready for new additions. They're quarantined until they get used to the rules and norms of the house. They immediately love the crates and jump in it anytime they can (except Jack prefers to jump on it and look out the window during the day). Slept like babies all night.

Saturday: Tried to get them used to the leash. Took them for a "walk." 20 minutes later, coaxed them out of the front gate and down 2 houses...that's it! Not a bad start, I suppose. Jack's a natural retriever....loves to catch things. Ivanna just loves to follow me around, rub up against me, wag her tail, and look up at me lovingly. Then she goes over and tries to bite Nerina. Still working on that one. Jack discovered my pond...and loves to get in it and eat the algae...thanks Jack!

I can't leave them outside unsupervised yet...when I did, they dug a potted plant, ate a few t-shirts laying outside, and jumped into my garden.
They get a few good hours of sunshine, play and running around time...then, it's back in their room for a while.

Sunday: My friend, TK, visits for the day...Jack eats the corner of his book. TK will learn not to do that anymore. Jack and Ivanna sunbathe while I lay nearby on the hammock. More leash training, this time inside the backyard. Jack and Ivanna are learning "this way," "leave it," and "come."

Beautiful day.